The emotion of scholarship

I was reading Nirad Chaudhuri's Autobiography of an Unknown Indian when I was at home this weekend. In one of the later chapters, the author tries to recollect his initiation into academic pursuits, particularly the study of history. He spends quite sometime arguing the case for scholarship at the same time describing the people, books and events that motivated him to become a writer. I was particularly captivated by a phrase he used - "to feel the emotion of scholarship". Many writers, particularly postmodern ones, often use the motif of verbal impotence or the incapability of words to articulate an emotion in their writings. I remembered this point being enunciated by my instructor in a recent literature elective I took as I read Chaudhuri's words, while at the same time remembering my failed attempts at convincing some of my friends and relatives about the career choice I intend to make. As I try to express my passion for science and desire to pursue it further to their patronizing air of presumptuousness, all I receive in return is rhetoric that presses me on to choose the utilitarian in the name of prudence. I give up for I do not want to act apologetic. What else can an unaccomplished romantic do?

He can tell the world to fuck off!